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09.28.08 - 10:24 p.m. well, ive tried all the old standbys--or, all the standbys i could think of. I cant remember what music i would listen to at these times. Ive had a six pack of budweiser, a fourth a cup of vanilla yogurt with walnuts, an apple with peanut butter and a nectarine. I guess this goes to show you that you can be an alcoholic and still get all your vitamins (plus carbs!)Ah, the fortune of being raised by farm families turned boxed wine drinkers. Im home alone tonight. My home will soon be no longer my home, or still my home but shared under questionable circumstances. Things with the Man and i have been a little rocky lately. Neither of us wants to touch the other and when we do touch it feels like a surprise, like a fly landing on your ankle. Irritating but innocuous. He wants what i thought to call Man Time, but when i started to leave he gets anxious and silent. I leave, because thats what i do when someone isnt saying novenas for my presence. I come home and do yoga, smoke a few bowls and eat some peanut butter. Every now and then i check in on the football games that seem to hold new found meaning for him. He calls to "check in" and i wish he would call an apologize for his inconsiderateness. Of course, we are going through a normal couple rut--one, even, that we have talked about in detail. But, its poor timing. � 
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