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06.25.02 - 4:37 p.m. and today. overwhelmed. i havent felt TRULY overwhelmed in a situation requiring immediate action in a long long time, i dont know if it has ever happened. Lunch today in clothes that i have come to truly dislike. Six credit cards, five bills, 4 angry businessmen, 4 cartoon character 50 somethings, and on top of all that 3 normal people who still havent gotten their food because...woops...you know, i forgot to order it. Some poor waiter in terrace uniform pretended to be kate and ended up mostly taking care of them while i held everyone elses bill and looked for someone else to make sense of it. That sick feeling in my stomach and sweat down my back and breathlessness, it was painful. I gave up. Myabe thats the worst part. I got totally overwhelmed and gave up. Everyone feels sorry for me. I am a server virgin and everyone keeps saying things like "poor baby," and "oh darling." It makes me mad, i want to tell them to fuck themselves, but i dont have time. I might as well be the only person in that place. Me and my tables, i barely keep it together if im not totally focused. It makes my brain hurt. It wasnt that bad though, once someone was standing next to me it wasnt so bad, and i still made over 15%. So while i keep fucking up, my tips dont really exhibit that, which is good for me and bad for everyone that has to keep covering my ass. This entry lacks any semblance of originality. I hate that. � 
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